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I listened to this whole part last night thinking the exact same thing Julie. Him showing up that Wednesday was awful. I literally felt used on Eva's behalf. Even listening to Eva in the elevator a few chapters further on as Gideon is returning her promise ring, and she is talking about him just f*cking her, and blowing his load. It was awful. Thinking about her past with Nathan, and then listening to her words, it became overwhelming.  Yes after reading the whole book you certainly understand everything more, but it doesn't erase how awful some of these scenes are.Â